Who is the best person to handle your finances? It’s you, but let’s say you’re the kind that can make money but don’t know what to do with it once it’s yours. Or perhaps you know a bit about personal finance but need some help on the more complicated matters associated with managing your money. Or maybe you don’t want a thing to do with handling your finances. You simply want to turn them over to someone else. In all of these cases, you may be in the market for a financial adviser. But the world of financial planners is full of sharks. In most states, anyone can call themselves a financial adviser, even if they don’t have any training. So how do you pick a financial planner who knows what they’re doing and won’t rip you off by only working to turn your money into theirs? A few thoughts…

Financial pros will ask you questions such as your expectations for returns and tolerance for risk, but because you’re doing the hiring, you should also do some interviewing.

1. What process do you follow to identify goals and evaluate performance?
2. What are your sources of research and information?
3. How often will you hold formal meetings and reviews with us?
4. Are you available for informal meetings?
5. What is the fee structure?
6. How are you compensated?
7. If I have a complaint, where do I take it?
8. Does your firm have a formal dispute-resolution process?
9.  Can you show me representative portfolios or actual client case studies?

The first step is making sure the planner’s expertise meets your needs. Then there’s another issue of compatibility. Is the adviser someone you can confide in, someone you feel comfortable going to with questions, problems, and concerns? The answers won’t tell you everything. References will be self selected. Even clients’ overall portfolio returns are of limited value because of timing differences. What’s helpful is the actual performance of the funds or accounts an adviser proposes for you, which you should ask for.

You’ll also want to check to be sure your planner hasn’t had any run ins with regulators. But your real goal is to smoke out bluster and get a sense if someone is candid and intelligent. That takes face time. The more research you do and questions you ask before signing on with someone, the fewer problems you’re likely to experience down the road.

December 12th

To my firstborn son, Jack,

I’m writing this to you just as you’re a few weeks old. At this point in your life you’re unable to read much less understand anything that I might try to say. As far as I can tell, your only concerns are to fed, sleep, and receive your parents’ undying attention, but I write hoping that one day these letters would tell you what kind of people your mom and I are as we bring you into this world. I thought it might be important because I’m not quite sure we’ll be the same when you’re old enough. God forbid anything should happen to us, at least you’ll always have a part of me.

I know you won’t be the same when you’re older and it’s important to know where you come from. Sitting by your crib, I can already tell that you have your mother’s sense of humor. You laugh at almost everything I say and blankly look at me when my jokes aren’t too funny. You also have her twinkling eyes and and her cute nose that first attracted me to her. I can see your grandfather’s chin, which is mine also. It’s a chin forged through years of sturdiness and calm, something that you’ll need in this stressful and hectic world. I’m sorry, but you also have my ears. They’re also going to help instill something inside you, because the other kids and the girls will probably make fun of you for them.

I find myself utterly unprepared to be your father. Night after night, I wonder what kind of person you might become and the role that I’ll play in the man that you’ll be. Please don’t judge me or your mom too harshly, but I think your little brother or sister will turn out better. You’re our first and we’re going to try our hardest, but we’ll make mistakes. I just hope they’re not that kind of mistakes that leave you with years of therapy bills or latent fears that may pervade into your other relationships.

In a few weeks, we’ll be celebrating your very first Christmas! Your mom and I are very excited. She wants to make a big deal of it, but I keep telling her that I’ll just dress you in a big black garbage bag and call it a day. You’ll grow to find that your dad’s not too keen on the fashion senses. I think your mom will win with this one and you’re going to have a great first Christmas… assuming you’re still a good boy these next two weeks.

I plan to write you again. I’ll tell of how I met your mother, lessons that I want to pass on, and share the things I value the most. Again, that’s the purpose of these letters. So that one day, you know who your old man and his wife are and maybe in a small way figure out who you are too.

You are always wanted and well loved.

I love you dearly,

Dad

This was written by Robert Herrick in the 17th century. A prolific writer, he penned over 2,500 poems. The overwhelming messages of his work is that the world is a beautiful place, love is splendid, that life is short, and we must make use of the time we have on Earth. Carpe diem!

Seize the day. Seize this day. That’s the “anthem” of the modern day person. We’re suppose to wake up, fly out of bed, feet landing with a thud, and squeeze every bit of pulp out of life. No matter what the circumstances, we shouldn’t be overly tired, overly stressed, overly sad, or dwell on the past. At any point, if we linger on the negative or less than happy emotions or physical state, we’ve lived less than we could. We must be forward thinking and always moving forward. The arrow of time after all does not sit still nor take a turn back once it’s been flung.

It’s really tough to imagine this kind of person if they really exist. It’s an ideal. We often wake up groggy and wearied eyed from staying up too late for no good reason, barely able to drag ourselves away from the bed. We’re battered from working in our cubicles, spending at least eight hours a day doing work that we don’t love or even like all too much, coming home lifeless and out of breath. We’re pained by loss and heartache. Life always has a way of completely stopping us in its tracks. We dwell and ruminate. Our arrow frozen in flight, encased in a thickening shell of ice.

Then one day we wake up and realize that the promises of more days might not come again and that there may be less days ahead than behind. We worry that our legacy will be, “He worked hard at so and so for x number of decades and had nothing to show for it”. We angst at the thought that our lives might amount to be very unremarkable and unknown.

This is why I’ve been and will be writing again. Not for fame or riches, but for the need to always create, engage, and tell stories that tickle my soul and fire the synapses of imagination. I’ve found the most joy and deep passion out of this and it’s my way of seizing the day. What’s yours?

This isn’t a call to irresponsibility and to drop everything in life, although it might mean that. This is a call to live each day in richness, fullness, and joy. This is a call to passion and its relentless pursuit. Time to abandon the shackles and whatever else holds you down. Walk with me. Do, create, share, live, enjoy. And here we begin again.